Believe Really Hard!

Today's weather bodes a December next year pretty much like this year's - cold, hot, wet, sunny, calm, windy.....a lot like life, actually.

The long awaited call from MSK came last evening and, considering the season, did not bear good tidings. The lung cancer is back and has also spread to the pancreatic tail - probably. I say probably because although the type of cell seems to be the same, the specialists are not able to determine without doubt that it is not a new cancer in the pancreas. In layman's terms, it appears that they are covering their derrieres. (Ain't I toined into a lady with them fancy French words?)

Jack and I took this latest news pretty hard although not without hope. Dr. Pancreas has removed himself from the scene (or dropped me like a hot potato since my condition did not conform to his most positive and definite scenario) and has turned me over to Dr. Lung Oncologist (to be known as Dr. Lung O.) Fortunately for me, I saw Dr. Lung O two years ago for a second opinion on chemo so it was easier to get an appointment - although I am sure that the appointment for this Wednesday - December 17 - was both a miracle and a blessing as I expected to wait until at least mid January to see him. Hopefully, treatment will begin quickly.

According to the nurse from Dr. Pancreas' office, the treatment will most certainly be chemo with no surgery at this point if ever. I am concerned (essence of the understatement) about the pancreas but have been told that the pancreas issue will be addressed along with the lung and that the chemo will take care of both. Considering my past history with chemo, I am not looking forward to this at all. However, this life is too precious and full not to fight with all my might - and besides you, I have my family and all those Crones standing shoulder to shoulder with me. We will enter the battle armed with grace, strength, courage, determination and most of all love.....for after all, doesn't Love conquer all? I am pinning my hopes on the Master Oncologist Who will make all the final decisions anyway!

I know many of you will have questions but I don't have any answers but I promise to share what I learn as I go along. Meanwhile, keep praying but most of all

Believe!

As always, love from me to you!