Here I Am!

I am shocked to see that my last entry was for Memorial Day but I guess that was not too long ago.

Karen, Joe and Agnes Rose have moved in with us for a time until they find a house for themselves. Of course, Jack and I are enjoying our time with Agnes Rose and I am ever grateful for all the help Joe gives me with cooking and cleaning up! For instance, last night, after a long, very long day at MSKCC, I was exhausted and went straight into bed. I had a loin of pork ready to be put in the oven but Joe asked if he could jazz it up. Of course! He stuffed it with wonderful things including wild rice, cream cheese, apricots, prunes, walnuts. The scent alone pulled me out of my doldrums.

Ahhh....the doldrums and what caused them.....

Seemed to me like my hair has been falling out in clumps for the past month. Karen said it was just the season; I needed a higher dose of my thyroid medication; we all had some reason so we would not have to voice the real reason out loud. My hair is falling out from the Miracle Pill.
Ironically, both BP and Dr. Lung O walked in and said that my hair had gotten darker - well, ha, the hair that is falling out is all my silver hair. I asked them if my hair was falling out due to the chemo and they said several other clinical trial patients have reported the same thing. Hey, we are on an experimental medication that is shrinking our tumors so what's a little hair loss. That's what I said, but it really wasn't what I was thinking at the moment. It is funny to look at myself and see my hair turning dark brown again but I'm one of the few people who embraced my silver hair - I loved it. It was shiny and different and had come in without causing the rest of my hair to be "mousy." Now I have skinny dark brown hair where there used to be really thick silver curls.

Once I decided to leave my cave yesterday, floating on the scents coming from the kitchen, I realized that I'd rather have no hair above the ground than flowing locks under it. I will accept this new adventure on the journey and rejoice that I am still able to laugh and sing with Agnes Rose. I firmly believe we are never sent more than we can carry.

I'm looking forward to our family vacation to celebrate our 40 wedding anniversary. Surf, sun and sand.....and good books, food and a vodka or two. Ahhhh! Life is good.

Believe! Hope!

As always, love from me to you!